REDUCE STRESS; Get Rid of Dysfunctional Money Behaviors – Part 1

• Tweet

• Tweet

“When I chased after money, I never had enough. When I got my life on purpose and focused on giving of myself and everything that arrived into my life, then I was prosperous.”
Wayne Dyer

 Ironic isn’t it that a personal finance blog writes so much about non-financial matters. If one focuses on passion and service in life, practices discipline in all things, then money becomes less of a target and life becomes richer.

 MAIN TOPIC: Behavior is Everything

This article is the first in a series relating poor money behaviors with stress.

What you do and how you act determines the outcome of your life. We have a visiting college student, Juan, in our home for the summer. He is a bright, talented, and accomplished young man who has developed some unhelpful habits. Like many of us, he procrastinates which leads to distress. He has difficulty discerning the important from the unimportant. On top of that, this young man is graduating college soon and is defining his next career step. Recently, Juan realized that he is an adult and must behave as one. No more partying and spending with abandon, with no regard for the consequences.

Wow, it’s a lot for a young person today to contend with. Juan isn’t so different than many adults; he has difficulty managing his finances and paying his bills. We are attempting to help him focus on his future and learn the link between HEALTHY BEHAVIORS AND LIFE SUCCESS.

If I said it once, I said it 1000 times to my own daughter; your behavior defines who you are! It’s not what you say, but what you do that matters! This article will steal borrow some concepts from an article I came across called, “Emotions, Money & Financial Stress.”

Feel free to pass along these ideas to anyone who is looking to clean up their financial lives.

PRACTICAL APPLICATION: 1st Dysfunctional Money Behavior and How to Combat it

Depression, stress, and anxiety are all byproducts of money stress. Current “happiness” research shows that those individuals who experience more control over their lives are happier. Learn to recognize unhealthy money behaviors, control them, and reduce stress.

 PROBLEM 1: GO SHOPPING to solve your problems.

 In the same way that overeaters use food to solve emotional issues, over-shoppers go to the mall to “feel better.” In both cases, the relief is short lived, and creates more long lasting problems. If you use food to fill the emotional hole, you get fat and unhealthy. Use shopping the same way and you get debt, bills, & bad credit. Not to mention a home filled with stuff you don’t need!

SOLUTION:

1. Next time you feel the urge for emotional shopping-STOP.
2. Slow down, take a deep breath, and ask yourself what the real problem is.
3. Really examine what is bothering you, and then determine whether the BEST solution to this problem is shopping.
4. Is the solution to your stress and problems a trip to the mall? Will shopping offer a lasting answer to the problem?
5. If shopping will not provide a long term answer to the stress, then do not shop. First, accept the fact that life has its stressors and all successful individuals have learned to TOLERATE A CERTAIN DEGREE OF DISCOMFORT. Do not feel like it is imperative to immediately eliminate the anxiety.
6. Next, take a step to relax, take a walk, write in a journal, or talk to a friend. Find an activity that does not involve spending, to practice for a bit. Realize that the stress will not continue forever.
7. Finally, brainstorm possible solutions to the problem/stressor. Do it alone or with a friend. Write down any possible resolution you can think of.
8. Take a break and do nothing for a bit. Let your mind clear.
9. Come back later and plan your next step.

Work on this dysfunctional money behavior first. Recognize when ”the urge to splurge” happens and follow the steps to develop a healthy alternative.

 Stay tuned for part 2: Passion for Procrastination, in Dealing with Financial Matters 

ACTION STEPS:

Get a notebook and label it: “(your name) Personal Finance” and keep it by the computer. Use it to keep all of your personal finance goals, thoughts, activities, and plans.

• When the urge to spend, as a problem solving solution arises: DO NOT GIVE IN.
•  Make a list of relaxing activities.
•  Post your personal RELAXING ACTIVITIES prominently.
•  Practice one of these behaviors instead of shopping.

 RECENT FINDS IN THE PERSONAL FINANCE ARENA; No spending required!

CARNIVAL: Please visit the Carnival of Personal Finance at Funny About Money, where I’m featured, for more personal finance articles.

Check out the FREE sites I’ve been visiting recently, and enjoy:

Watson, Inc.-Free giveaway edition

Monevator

Wealth Pilgrim

Little House in the Valley  

Frugal Confessions

The Saved Quarter

 Len Penzo dot Com

My Journey to Millions

Digging Out from our Mess